Ardis looked at me with her bright, intelligent eyes as she labored to express her thoughts. When I had difficulty understanding something she said, she patiently repeated it until I got it. She is in her 60's now, and lives with cerebral palsy. She has a lot of pain, extremely limited mobility, requires the use of a walker to get around, and has difficulty communicating due to poor oral motor control. I've seldom encountered a person with her patience, persistence and compassion towards others despite her own challenges.
Over nearly 20 years of involvement with Bridge, Ardis has met many people she would not have otherwise known. Bridge expanded her world, and gave her an extended family. Originally, she was attracted to the Christian values of the organization, and was particularly appreciative of Bridge's advocacy for people living with disabilities and treating them with dignity. And more recently, she found herself turning to her Bridge family for support during a period of crisis in her own family.
Her sister and brother-in-law are very important people in Ardis' life, and over the years have provided support of all kinds, including emotional support and transportation so she can get out of the house, run errands, and just visit. When her
brother-in-law and her sister were diagnosed with serious illnesses one after the other, she became very fearful and anxious
about her future. At the Roots ‘n Wings Support group meetings, she was able to
work through her feelings of anxiety about possibly ending up alone and
isolated as her family had less time and energy for her. She shared her fear of
facing her own mortality, and that of those she loves. She was learning to be more independent, talking to friends about her concerns instead of only sharing them with her family.
Ardis said she was very grateful to have a group of friends who ‘get it’ and who care
about her to connect with on a regular basis at Roots’ n’ Wings, and a
community to connect with at the Celebrations. She likes seeing folks she
knows, and going where folks she knows will welcome her. She likes catching up
on everybody’s news and sharing hers. She feels better when she shares her
feelings and gets caring feedback. And it makes her feel good to make her
friends feel better by listening to them, and telling them she cares, sharing
her wisdom and experience.
Her family
also told her they were glad she had Bridge to lean on during the hard times when
they were unable to be there for her. We hear this kind of thing a lot from
people at Bridge. We see people going to great lengths to attend our gatherings
and participate in the Bridge community. They need to connect with people who
both understand and want to accompany them on their journey. A shared load
feels lighter on the shoulders, and being truly seen and acknowledged is
priceless.
When people
ask what we do at Bridge, it can be difficult to sum it up quickly in a way
that folks can understand. I recall our Executive Director invoking the TV show
Cheers to explain what we do once. Okay, we don’t have a pub and there’s no
alcohol in the drinks we serve,
unless there’s a bit of communion wine maybe. But I looked up the lyrics to the
theme song and found that, once again, it’s not what’s different about people
living with disabilities that matters – it’s what’s the same for all of us that
counts. And I think most of us can probably relate to these words:
Making your way in
the world today takes everything you've got.
Taking a break from all your worries, sure would
help a lot.
Wouldn't you like to get away?
Sometimes you want to go
Where everybody knows your name,
and they're always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows
Your name.
